Writing Jokes with Andrew Schulz (MTV, IFC)
I can’t remember my first joke. I think it was something about Magic Johnson playing with HIV and averaging 18 points a game.
[@andrewschulz on Twitter]
Any thoughts on the Knicks this season?
We’re gonna get the 3-seed. I know that’s completely unreasonable. But fuck it. I’m a Knicks fan. I’m unreasonable.
What’s your name and where did you grow up?
Andrew Schulz. Grew up in Manhattan, NYC
What’s interesting or uninteresting about Manhattan?
It’s boring to me but apparently it’s the most amazing city in the world. I find nature and that stuff way more fascinating. I guess what I find interesting is city folk are the least capable of survival of any human being. Everything about my life is convenient. I haven’t cooked a meal in six years. Starting a fire is just as far-fetched to me as space travel.
What did your parents do for a living when you were a kid?
My parents owned a ballroom dance studio.
Why did you first want to start performing comedy? What was the first joke or bit you tried in onstage?
I didn’t want to perform comedy. I always loved humor. Loved making people laugh. I was a big stand up fan, but it wasn’t until I was managing a restaurant that had a comedy night and one of the producers asked me to go on stage that I wanted to do it.
I can’t remember my first joke. I think it was something about Magic Johnson playing with HIV and averaging 18 points a game. My take was: how is he not averaging 100? Who’s playing tough D on him? A million comics probably thought of that joke. But hey, I was green.
Guy Code has really been a seminal part of dude humor for the past few years. What does MTV do well that other networks might be missing?
MTV rarely hires established talent. They groom nobodies that they believe in into somebodies. It’s cheaper!!! They’ve got to be responsible for more future stars than any other network.
What is the origin story behind The Brilliant Idiots podcast with Charlamagne?
Charlamagne and I would argue/discuss shit all the time. Random ideas. He got approached about doing a podcast and asked me to do it. We just funneled our arguments into a two-hour discussion and sprinkled-in some man-rape banter and boom: Brilliant Idiots.
Benders is the first show I’ve heard of about an intramural men’s hockey team. How did you land the role of Paul Rosenberg?
I lied and said I knew shit about hockey. I had done some stuff with Apostle in the past. They are great guys. They let me audition and thank god I got it.
What’s the hardest part about touring on the road as a comedian?
Loneliness. You’re Denzel Washington in the Book of Eli. You’re in a foreign city with no car and no friends. It gets lonely. I try and experience the city as much as possible. I’ll hang out with fans, random people that come to shows. Anyone.
What do you like or dislike about the comedy scene in New York?
I like the amount of stage time. I like the competition. You’re following the best. So you have to be that good. Sink or swim. It gets you good fast. I’m also from NY so living here and doing stand up isn’t as inspiring.
What’s the dumbest superhero name you can think of?
Superman. It’s so un creative. Not to mention he’s not even a man. He’s and alien. Everything is wrong.
Why are jokes funny?
They aren’t. Most jokes are horrible. People are funny and when they tell jokes they’re funny. Funny people are also funny when they don’t tell jokes. A joke is just a paintbrush. It takes someone funny to paint something beautiful. I hated how artsy that sounded. Ugh.
Andrew is a comedian. IFC’s BENDERS, The Brilliant Idiots Podcast, MTV2, MTV IG: AndrewSchulz For Bookings Contact: Bookings@TheAndrewSchulz.com
For more on humor, follow @jokewriting on Twitter
Interview by Zuri Irvin (@withzuri)
